Today is Valentine’s Day, and for once I’m not only not dreading it, I was looking forward to it. A moment I never truly thought I’d meet one day. And yes, I am indeed still single.

So, how did I get here? How did I go from dreading this holiday, to embracing it? Unfortunately, that is not a question I plan on answering in full today because my response might take awhile. Not because the answer is long, but because so much has happened in my life over the last few years that contributed, I don’t think I’d want to leave anything out.

I have compared my experience being single to the experience of feeling grief. Being single your whole life and wanting a relationship, makes you feel a loss of something you never quite got to experience. So, in short, I have been grieving the loss of a relationship I never had or might never have.

It wasn’t until today when naming this post, that I realized that what I have been feeling over the last few weeks can only be summed up as acceptance; a stage of grief. I have accepted my life as it is and embraced it. I still want a relationship. But I have also learned to love the life I have built on my own, the love I have maintained outside of romance, and have somehow found immense hope that God still has marriage in His plan for my life.

I’m not saying I feel this all the time. I know that there will be days that this will all still hit me hard and I won’t understand why. But isn’t that how grief is anyways? Fine one moment, and crying the next?

Maybe I feel this way because I’m now on medication for depression. Or maybe all the work I have done on myself and through therapy is finally paying off. Or maybe this is what almost turning 30 has done to me. There could be so many reasons on why and how I have ended up here. But I honestly don’t care about any of them. I only care about the joy I feel on a day that used to feel silly to me and where I would gag at all the couples photos.

I’m embracing Valentine’s Day today because it’s a day to express our love. Yes, our society has built it around romantic relationships, but I believe it should be and is more than that. I have so much love to give and have received so much love in return. And today gives me an extra excuse to be my cheesy hopeless romantic self.

I know this may not be encouraging to every single person out there, but I recently had an amazing conversation with my sister when I was asking her about love. I needed to give myself hope that the kind of love I’m searching for exists in the world. So, from one single person to another, if you need hope that you will find love, here it is.

I have been single for 30 years and I have hope that I will fall in love and get married. It may not happen on my timeline, but I believe that it will happen. And not just any love, but an epic love. In the meantime, I am not letting myself settle or hold back on any of the love or joy I feel.

I was in a really dark place last fall. And while that experience continues to teach me so much, I think right now it is teaching me to not take joy, love, and hope for granted. Because while depressed, I couldn’t feel any of it. So now that I feel it in abundance, I want to feel it all every moment of every day. And I refuse to apologize for that.

I might be single, but I am also relishing in this overrated holiday just because I can.

So, if you are single today, I encourage to find joy, hope, and love wherever you can. Grab your favorite coffee or a sweet treat. Celebrate with your single friends. Take yourself out or eat a favorite meal in while watching movie. Today, like any other day, can be a day to celebrate you, or anything else you want.